My secret

Do you have a secret thing you like to do? Just something that no one else knows you enjoy doing? I do, but it’s not going to be secret any longer, as I’m sharing it with you.

You see, I love Eurovision. Yes that’s right – the song contest. I love it all – the songs, the costumes, the mirror balls, the smoke machine and of course the wind machine. Last night I sat and watched the final – making sure I had stayed completely clueless as to who actually won it. (There are issues watching a show that has been delayed in telecast, and making sure I wasn’t told which song won, was my main aim yesterday).

But I love it. For that one night, Europe is brought together in song. And as the Swedes so nicely summed it up last night – We are One. And though I was a little upset that the rapping spacemen and Borg Queen hadn’t progressed from the semi finals (thank you Montenegro you gave me the best laugh I’d had in a very long time), it was still fun. There was Bonnie Tyler representing the UK, and the catchy Greek Ska of Koza Mostra featuring Agathon Iakovidis, all in one place! And a song written by a member of Black Sabbath’s guitarist too – which lent a little bit more of credibility to the show for my partner…….

And I have to admit – while I’m telling you about this secret – I loved the host this year – Petra Mede – she was funny, and such a breath of fresh air. And I truly love the Swedish sense of humour too!

So there we are – my little secret, I watch Eurovision every year. I love it!, For me living in Australia there is something very special about listening to short songs, often sung in languages I’ve  never heard before for example Eyþór Ingi Gunnlaugsson’s Ég Á Líf – what more could a girl want a Viking singing????

Because there are times in your life, when you need a little bit of escapist fiction, and Eurovision provides this in bucket loads. Long may Eurovision continue!

Working outside

We’ve just spent the day at my niece’s property, working hard in the fresh air that can only be an autumn day in country Victoria.

It was a day for all the family to help out and try and get her house ready for winter. My partner spent a good part of the day, knocking out a ceiling, patching up the roof, and moving large amounts of plasterboard around the house.

My son and I spent it outside – yes the entire day, without TV or music, just him and me working at tending the fire that had been built to burn some of the wood that had been piling up under the trees on her property. The dangerous stuff that if left for summer, would become a fire hazard.

Now as any parent or guardian of an active six year old would know, this task taxed my multi skilling ability - my one eye on the fire, one eye on where my son was, and one eye on the wood I was busy collecting to boot. 

But what I learnt, and this is another lesson my son has taught me, he respects me enough not to go near the fire, that he truly wanted to help me, and enjoyed the time that we two had together.

We sat and watched the flames together, quietly at times, and he would shush me if I spoke, he told me we both needed quiet thinking time. And so we sat together in a rare silence, that doesn’t exist at home, where the radio, or the cd player or the television is always playing. It was just the pair of us, enjoying each other’s company. And I wondered again, how lucky I was to have this magical little person in my life, who is as wise as the hills sometimes, and who loves a good laugh too when Mum tells funny stories of my parents…..

The children we have, are just passing through, for they grow too soon into adults. So I will enjoy these days with him, and spend the time marvelling again at how incredibly special he is to me.

Pondering

Walking in the cold rain to and from school gives me a lot of time to ponder. And I do take advantage of this time, especially after I’ve dropped my child off, and I have a chance to catch up with myself, after the morning rush to get my partner off to his teaching rounds, and our child off to school. (In between unstacking and stacking the dishwasher, putting a load of washing on, hanging out the clean laundry, feeding the cat and dog….my morning chores are endless. )

And I’ve been wondering how my mother or even her mother coped, with more children, less appliances and a lot more hard work running the family homes. I am indeed fortunate for  a working dishwasher, and a washing machine that can take care of itself. Growing up with an old fashioned twin tub, I was the one who did the laundry for Mum, so I spent a lot of time nursing the twin tub through the many loads. But before that, my Mum remembered her Mum doing it the hard way – and thought her twin tub was the height of fashion!

And each day, I give thanks for living in the first world, where at least here in Australia, we have a support system for the poor, and provide basic medical coverage for free for everyone. We do still have a long way to go to address the inequitable treatment of the folk who have slipped through the system, but we’re still in a lot better situation then the rest of the world.

And I thank my parents who took the plunge paid the ten pound fee to emigrate and move us to Australia.

Alice Walker Quote

I found this quote by Alice Walker and for me it is quite appropriate for my Mother…..

Yes, Mother. I can see you are flawed. You have not hidden it. That is your greatest gift to me

Thank you Alice Walker – American author, poet and activist

Mother’s Day

As you celebrate Mother’s Day this year, think for a moment of all the children who will not have a mother to celebrate with. The children who have lost their mother’s to conflict, to childbirth, to violence, cancer…..the list goes on.

For me it’s a day of reflection, a day when I think of my own Mum, and everything she sacrificed to ensure that I could have a decent education. I have a mother in law, and also a dear friend who has stepped in to be my son’s Grandma, and I love them both for their parts in my life. But they will never fill the hole that the loss of my Mum made in me.

I will also be thinking of the little son of my murdered friend, who will not have his Mum there to give the little gifts he’s made at kindy to. His life has forever been changed by the selfish act of another.

I’ll be contacting my friends who have lost their mums this week, to send them hugs, and make sure that they are doing okay at this time of the year, when the memories flow, and anniversaries pass. And on Sunday when my son brings in his homemade card and present, I will treasure the fact that he is with me, and I can celebrate mother’s day with him.

Throwdown

This came through today, and I just wanted to share it with you, so sit back and read…..

 

Throwdown

by Jena Strong

give me the drag queens, dolled up and delicious
the two moms bickering over the dishes
the orphans, adopted, the chosen, the trannies
the witches, the protestors, tattooed laughing grannies
the boys wearing tutus and all the shirtless
daughters of the revolution playing basketball
on the broken courts of lost fathers
the failures, the forgotten, the throwdown, the freak show
the hurts and the heartbreaks, the hassles and headaches
the beggar, the baron, the shelter, the clambake
trade in the cynical, the stubborn, the splintering showdown
because it’s time to unite now, yes it’s time to ignite now

it’s time to pick up the phone to say, It’s me and I love you

Letting things go…..

It’s taken me forty-three years to reach this moment. A lifetime of hopes and dreams, of death and despair.

But those years have been fundamental to who I am, to where I am, and who I want to be. Without the years of hard work, I would not be living in a home that my partner and I own outright. No mortgage that’s right, and with that the opportunity for both of us to take the time out and study for a year.

Without losing my Mother, I may still be living in Adelaide, still in a relationship with a man who was not right for me. I would never have moved to Canberra, met my best friends, and the man I was to fall in love with.

Without the long illness and death of my Father, I would not have moved to Melbourne, where I met so may good mates, and worked with some tremendous blokes.

For with every change in my life, I’ve been able to move on, and keep moving, even if at times its felt like life would never turn a corner, it has, and I’ve grown.

I recently had dinner out with my dear partner. It was our first meal out together, alone, for many months – some might even suggest over a year had passed since we had been out together alone. Waiting as my partner paid the bill, I overheard the conversation at the table behind us. The table had two beautiful young women at it, who were speaking about their suicide attempts. Yes attempts. You see both had tried on numerous occasions. One of their friends had succeeded, and they were together to talk about it. And it made me think, really think deeply how fleeting our lives are.

And that by our deeds and actions, we can help the people around us. A kind word offered, a hug when someone needs it, just listening when someone looks troubled, these we can offer, and should offer. Imagine a world where kindness and generosity are treasured, and not the material objects you have accumulated. Imagine the difference that would make to those around you, and the folk who are out there doing it tough, struggling with their burdens.

I believe we can change the world, one little gesture at a time.