Do you accept yourself?
Or do you hide a part of yourself away, ashamed of who you are or what you think or how you feel?
Living in and with total acceptance of yourself is hard.
I’ve struggled with accepting who I am for a long while. The fact that I was never quite good enough in my parent’s eyes really had long-term effects on who I was, and it influenced so many of my early life decisions. The conditions that were placed on their love, and the fact that no matter how hard I did work at getting the good grades, at being the dutiful obedient daughter, at the housework…it was all not good enough.
Making the decision that I would no longer be bound by these roles and responsibilities was a big step, in learning to accept who I am. And realising that who I am, is not dependant on the roles people try to push me into is another critical step forward. I am who I am is my new mantra.
Of course the years of self perfectionist behaviour that drove me on and on, searching and seeking for the mythical acceptance by others, still rears its rather ugly head. I’ve found this especially true when it comes to my studies, as I drive myself on and on, to do better and better…..sometimes to the detriment of my true self.
So that’s when the technique of slowing down, and breathing deeply comes into play. It sometimes works, and sometimes I am so wired from trying to have it all, that it doesn’t. But accepting that this is my behaviour, and owning it, is just the first step in countering it.
Life is all about learning. And if we are to truly learn from our experiences and grow from them, it is a lot easier for us to do this from a position of self acceptance rather than self criticism. Because if we accept ourselves, we can open ourselves to all the adventures and challenges that will make us grow into the exceptional human beings I know we are.